On Thursday, the day after my post-op appointment, I was scheduled to see Dr. Tucker so that she could adjust the hearing aid for my right, non-Esteem ear, as this would be my only ear for the next two weeks!
As I had mentioned in a previous post (click HERE to view), I lost and had to be fitted for a new hearing aid right before I left for surgery. When my hearing aid finally arrived the week before surgery, my audiologist was able to fit my hearing aid with a standard adjustment based on my most recent hearing test (which had been almost a year ago). She knew I was in a bit of a time crunch and wanted to get it to me as soon as she possibly could. I had been worried that it would not sound right since I was not there during the fitting, but I was actually surprised by how much better everything sounded with my new hearing aid. However, being being the perfectionist that I am, I felt the need to have another test conducted so that my hearing aid could be more personally programmed to fit my needs.
I managed to get an appointment the Friday before I was leaving for surgery. However, looking back, I kind of wish that I would have just stuck with the settings she gave me originally. While I was more than grateful that my new audiologist was able to get my hearing aid to me so quickly, our personalities had definitely clashed while she was trying to adjust my hearing aid. The entire time I continually expressed my discomfort, as some sounds felt piercingly loud to the point where I would actually cringe. Normally, I would say the louder the better, but since my hearing has decreased at such an expedited rate, I have become increasingly concerned that my hearing aid may actually be damaging my hearing. So, over the past year or so, I have tried to be cautious about having my settings "too" loud.
No matter what I said, my audiologist just would not listen to me. During the entire appointment, I had felt like she was basically telling me that what I was experiencing was wrong or impossible. Like she knew what the heck I was experiencing in that moment! It was like she programmed my hearing aid strictly based on my new test results and didn't care to tweak it further as she told me, "The test do not lie". After more probing, she turned the entire volume down a couple of notches, which did not seem to help remove the piercing tone in the slightest (just made the sounds that did feel comfortable quieter). I also had the feeling that she was trying to rush me out of there because after a few tweaks she seemed to just give up and tell me that there was nothing more she could do. I left my appointment in tears. I was actually so upset that instead of going straight to work, I took a detour home to calm myself down. Since it was a Friday, and I was leaving early Monday morning, I, unfortunately, was not able to "fix" things before my trip to San Jose, and quite frankly, I was even not sure if I ever wanted to go back and see her again.
Anyways, during my pre-op appointment, I had told Dr. Tucker about what had happened and expressed my concern with the piercing and uncomfortable pitches. While she seemed concerned for me, she was not sure if she had any available appointments on such late notice. As amazing as she is, she somehow managed to fit me in on Thursday, the day before we were scheduled to leave. As you can imagine, I was beyond relieved.
I do not know why but I have had such a difficult time finding an audiologist in Denver whom I feel comfortable with and trust; someone who will listens to my every need and concern; someone who treats me like I am their only patient (even if it means making others wait). Essentially, I have not been able to find someone as wonderful as my audiologist in St. Louis, Jennifer.
I have to say that Dr. Tucker definitely met my approval. She is such a kind person and seems to really care about her patients. I felt as if she listened to my concerns and made tweaks and adjustments based on what I was telling her. She even went the extra mile to make loud noises so that we could figure out the tone that was uncomfortable and make sure that it was no longer piercing. If something did not sound right, she would try something new. She did not give up. She also was able to customized programs so that I would be able to turn the volume up and down, which my audiologist in Denver said was impossible to do with only one hearing aid.
I left that appointment feeling much more comfortable and happy about my hearing aid adjustments which gave me faith that there are doctors/audiologist out there who do truly care about US as people. Who sympathize with our everyday struggle and want nothing more than to help us and make our lives easier.
What I realized today is that, sometimes, being your best advocate is not always about asking the right questions, or being informed, or pushing your doctor/audiologist to get you what you need. Sometimes, it is not even about you; it is about them. To them, you may always be just another patient; another piece of paper. And unfortunately, there is nothing you can do to change that. Except...well...walking away. Just like any relationship in our lives, your relationship with your health care provider must be built on trust and you must feel that "spark" or "connection". So, what I realized is that being your best advocate is sometimes, simply, knowing in your heart what you deserve and when it is time to walk away.
Showing posts with label Advocate. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Advocate. Show all posts
Thursday, January 24, 2013
Thursday, January 17, 2013
Getting Ready for Revision Surgery (the last couple of weeks)
My main goal over the last couple of weeks has been to keep
my self as un-stressed as possible. However, my plan has not been as successful
as I had hoped.
I had returned from a nice long vacation celebrating the Christmas Holiday with my family in St. Louis to find a big ‘ol surprise in the mail…. A Jury Duty Summons! I was expected to appear at the Lindsey-Flanigan Courthouse at 8:30AM on Wednesday, January 16. Four days before I was leaving for surgery.
Seriously????
The next day, I contacted the jury commissioner. I was secretly hoping that this would be one of those rare situations where I could use my hearing loss to my advantage. If not, I am getting surgery the week after I am expected to report. Now that definitely has to be a valid excuse! Right?
Wrong! This conversation did not go as I had planned. I was told that Wednesday trials typically last 1-3 days and that since I am in the state the day I am expected to report, I needed to be there. I always thought it would be fun and exciting to be part of a jury but the timing could not be worse. It was very stressful for me to imagine that my last week in the office, my last couple of days to tie up loose ends, would be shorten before being out of the office for 2+ weeks. While my employer has been very accommodating in making sure that I do not stress out about my work before surgery, I hold myself to a very high standard and I know that some of my work would be difficult for someone else to pick up if I were not able to finish it. The last thing I wanted was to come back to work with a very long to-do list.
As the New Year approached, I somehow managed to lose my hearing aid. In the 4 years I have had my hearing aids, I have only had one “accident” where the wire became disconnected from the receiver. When this happened, I was without a hearing aid for two weeks and although I have always HATED wearing hearing aids, it was then that I realized how dependent I was on them to function in everyday conversation. From that point on, I vowed to always take very good care of them. And I had…until I received my Esteem Implant.
After I was implanted with the Esteem, I started to care less and less for my hearing aid. When I would take it out, I would leave it in the most random places… Like next to a glass of water on my nightstand or coffee table; carelessly thrown in my purse; on the toilet seat before getting in the shower. And sometimes, if I got really tired (and lazy) waiting for my husband to come to bed, I would just place it on the bed next to me assuming that my husband would find it and put it somewhere safe when he came to bed for the night.
I cannot tell you how many times in the last year I have woken up and had to frantically search and strip my house in an attempt to find my hearing aid because I had “misplaced” it. My husband is constantly telling me that I need to be more careful about where I place my hearing aid, but every time we go through this, it always manages to turn up.
Well… not this time. Of course. So here I was, 3 weeks before surgery, a surgery that would leave me completely deaf in my implanted ear for the next two months, and my hearing aid (i.e., the only ear I have for the next two months) was nowhere to be found. This may not seems like a big deal, but I should mention that I do not have an audiologist in Denver. I bought my hearing aids in St. Louis and would always have my testing and adjustments done when I went home to visit. In the 10 years I have lived in Denver, there has never been a need for me to find a new audiologist in the area. Until now… Seriously? The timing couldn't be worse…
I first contacted my audiologist at home and she gave me some positive news... that my hearing aids were still under warranty through March 2013. She said she could order me an exact copy of my old hearing aid but suggested that I connect with someone in the area to get a new ear mold as the shape of our ears change over time and if I am going to be getting a new hearing aid, I might as well make sure it is completely up to date. Additionally, she also felt that it would be difficult for her to program the hearing aid without me there.
I waited a couple of days to see if it would turn up like it always does. As I waited, I researched audiologist in the area that accept my insurance and work with Phonak hearing aids. When my hearing aid never turned up, I made an appointment with a local audiologist. The audiologist charged $82 to have the ear mold made, $250 for a loss and damage claim, and $40 to expedite the processing and delivery. Although this is MUCH MUCH better than having to buy a brand new hearing aid (~$3,000 cost), this was an extra cost I had not planned for and ultimately, more weight to add to the heavy load I was already carrying. As if I did not already have enough to worry about on top of the normal stresses one faces as they prepare for surgery and traveling.
I stuck it on the credit card and told myself not to think about the costs. I would worry about those later. I had other things to worry about… Like if it would actually arrive before I left for surgery. As you can imagine, I have been driving myself absolutely crazy with anticipation and contemplating the “what-ifs”.
I spent the next week praying endlessly that my juror number would not be called and that my hearing aid would find its way to me in time, preferably before jury duty so that I would actually be able to hear and follow directions and know what the heck was going on. I also worked my little butt off to make sure that all my high priority tasks were completed before I reported to jury duty, in preparation for the worst case scenario (i.e., that I would not be able to work my last 3 days in the office), which was pretty much expected seeing what my luck has been like recently.
Things have started to fall into place this week (the week before surgery). My hearing aid was delivered on Monday morning and I was able to have it fitted that day. Yes... I couldn't believe it either. Before surgery AND before jury duty! On a side note, I am hearing much better with this new hearing aid, which is definitely an extra plus considering this will be my only ear for the next two months. By the end of the day on Tuesday, all of my “important” tasks had been completed at work, which was a relief as the next day I was reporting for jury duty and there was a possibility that I would not be back in the office before I left for surgery. When I woke up Wednesday morning, I checked to see if my number was listed and ultimately, if I would have to report to jury duty. Unfortunately, my number was listed. Things were going way to good, right? BUT during the four hours I was there, the commissioner called 4 sets of jurors and my number was NOT called (happy dance time!). Obviously, it would have been ideal to not have to report at all, but everything went as smoothly as it possibly could have. As you can imagine, I felt SO relieved!
While the last couple of weeks have had their challenges, everything turned out fine in the end. Thank goodness! I feel like so much weight has been lifted off my shoulders and that I can finally take a deep breath, relax, and truly prepare my mind, body, and soul for this surgery so that I am able to have a quick and speedy recovery.
I had returned from a nice long vacation celebrating the Christmas Holiday with my family in St. Louis to find a big ‘ol surprise in the mail…. A Jury Duty Summons! I was expected to appear at the Lindsey-Flanigan Courthouse at 8:30AM on Wednesday, January 16. Four days before I was leaving for surgery.
Seriously????
The next day, I contacted the jury commissioner. I was secretly hoping that this would be one of those rare situations where I could use my hearing loss to my advantage. If not, I am getting surgery the week after I am expected to report. Now that definitely has to be a valid excuse! Right?
Wrong! This conversation did not go as I had planned. I was told that Wednesday trials typically last 1-3 days and that since I am in the state the day I am expected to report, I needed to be there. I always thought it would be fun and exciting to be part of a jury but the timing could not be worse. It was very stressful for me to imagine that my last week in the office, my last couple of days to tie up loose ends, would be shorten before being out of the office for 2+ weeks. While my employer has been very accommodating in making sure that I do not stress out about my work before surgery, I hold myself to a very high standard and I know that some of my work would be difficult for someone else to pick up if I were not able to finish it. The last thing I wanted was to come back to work with a very long to-do list.
As the New Year approached, I somehow managed to lose my hearing aid. In the 4 years I have had my hearing aids, I have only had one “accident” where the wire became disconnected from the receiver. When this happened, I was without a hearing aid for two weeks and although I have always HATED wearing hearing aids, it was then that I realized how dependent I was on them to function in everyday conversation. From that point on, I vowed to always take very good care of them. And I had…until I received my Esteem Implant.
After I was implanted with the Esteem, I started to care less and less for my hearing aid. When I would take it out, I would leave it in the most random places… Like next to a glass of water on my nightstand or coffee table; carelessly thrown in my purse; on the toilet seat before getting in the shower. And sometimes, if I got really tired (and lazy) waiting for my husband to come to bed, I would just place it on the bed next to me assuming that my husband would find it and put it somewhere safe when he came to bed for the night.
I cannot tell you how many times in the last year I have woken up and had to frantically search and strip my house in an attempt to find my hearing aid because I had “misplaced” it. My husband is constantly telling me that I need to be more careful about where I place my hearing aid, but every time we go through this, it always manages to turn up.
Well… not this time. Of course. So here I was, 3 weeks before surgery, a surgery that would leave me completely deaf in my implanted ear for the next two months, and my hearing aid (i.e., the only ear I have for the next two months) was nowhere to be found. This may not seems like a big deal, but I should mention that I do not have an audiologist in Denver. I bought my hearing aids in St. Louis and would always have my testing and adjustments done when I went home to visit. In the 10 years I have lived in Denver, there has never been a need for me to find a new audiologist in the area. Until now… Seriously? The timing couldn't be worse…
I first contacted my audiologist at home and she gave me some positive news... that my hearing aids were still under warranty through March 2013. She said she could order me an exact copy of my old hearing aid but suggested that I connect with someone in the area to get a new ear mold as the shape of our ears change over time and if I am going to be getting a new hearing aid, I might as well make sure it is completely up to date. Additionally, she also felt that it would be difficult for her to program the hearing aid without me there.
I waited a couple of days to see if it would turn up like it always does. As I waited, I researched audiologist in the area that accept my insurance and work with Phonak hearing aids. When my hearing aid never turned up, I made an appointment with a local audiologist. The audiologist charged $82 to have the ear mold made, $250 for a loss and damage claim, and $40 to expedite the processing and delivery. Although this is MUCH MUCH better than having to buy a brand new hearing aid (~$3,000 cost), this was an extra cost I had not planned for and ultimately, more weight to add to the heavy load I was already carrying. As if I did not already have enough to worry about on top of the normal stresses one faces as they prepare for surgery and traveling.
I stuck it on the credit card and told myself not to think about the costs. I would worry about those later. I had other things to worry about… Like if it would actually arrive before I left for surgery. As you can imagine, I have been driving myself absolutely crazy with anticipation and contemplating the “what-ifs”.
I spent the next week praying endlessly that my juror number would not be called and that my hearing aid would find its way to me in time, preferably before jury duty so that I would actually be able to hear and follow directions and know what the heck was going on. I also worked my little butt off to make sure that all my high priority tasks were completed before I reported to jury duty, in preparation for the worst case scenario (i.e., that I would not be able to work my last 3 days in the office), which was pretty much expected seeing what my luck has been like recently.
Things have started to fall into place this week (the week before surgery). My hearing aid was delivered on Monday morning and I was able to have it fitted that day. Yes... I couldn't believe it either. Before surgery AND before jury duty! On a side note, I am hearing much better with this new hearing aid, which is definitely an extra plus considering this will be my only ear for the next two months. By the end of the day on Tuesday, all of my “important” tasks had been completed at work, which was a relief as the next day I was reporting for jury duty and there was a possibility that I would not be back in the office before I left for surgery. When I woke up Wednesday morning, I checked to see if my number was listed and ultimately, if I would have to report to jury duty. Unfortunately, my number was listed. Things were going way to good, right? BUT during the four hours I was there, the commissioner called 4 sets of jurors and my number was NOT called (happy dance time!). Obviously, it would have been ideal to not have to report at all, but everything went as smoothly as it possibly could have. As you can imagine, I felt SO relieved!
While the last couple of weeks have had their challenges, everything turned out fine in the end. Thank goodness! I feel like so much weight has been lifted off my shoulders and that I can finally take a deep breath, relax, and truly prepare my mind, body, and soul for this surgery so that I am able to have a quick and speedy recovery.
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