Revision Surgery (Part 1): Pre-Op

Fraser and I arrived at the San Jose Airport around 1:30 PM on Monday afternoon. My mother-in-law, Lydia, had flown into San Francisco, rented a car, and drove to San Jose to pick us up. When we got to the baggage claim, she was already there waiting for us and I have to say, her near presence was very comforting to me as it brought a sense of serenity to the anxious aura I seemed to be carrying that morning.

We had very little time before my first appointment, so we quickly checked into the hotel, grabbed a bite to eat, and made our way to the Camino Ear, Nose, and Throat Clinic. When we arrived, I was sent back so that the onsite audiologist, Dr. Tucker, could conduct some routine hearing tests. I was a bit surprised to be working with an audiologist, as I normally met with an Esteem Engineer for testing in the past; However, this shift was not completely surprising as training audiologist had been a part of Envoy’s new business model in order to make routine testing and adjustments for the Esteem more accessible to clients. 

Once the testing was complete, Lydia, Fraser, and I met with one of Dr. Murray's staff to review information regarding my before and after surgery care. Before my initial surgery, we were provided with very little information about what to expect after surgery and I will admit that this was partly because we were not even sure the type of questions to ask when we had the chance. Because of this, my recovery from the initial surgery did not go very smoothly; I was very sick and in a TON of pain. Words cannot explain what a terrifying experience this was for not only myself, but also my parents and Fraser who had been there to take care of me. We had all felt as if we were thrown into an unfamiliar situation without any idea of how to respond. Even when Fraser had contacted Dr. Marzo's staff the day after my initial surgery for more specific directions on managing my nausea and pain, they had not been very direct with him and even called me a "baby". I know that I may have a low pain threshold, but How Rude!

Therefore, you can imagine how surprised and grateful we were to have someone willing and able to sit down with us, review the information we needed to know, and allow us to ask questions. They even gave us a paper copy of what they told us in case we forgot (which our tired brains obviously would have - that was a lot of information!). I think that Fraser and Lydia were especially grateful of this time as it allowed them to feel more prepared and confident in providing me with the appropriate care after surgery.

And it gets better... We were provided with a cute little carrying case to hold all of the medications I would need on my road to recovery. The convenience of having my prescriptions filled and all ready to go was so nice, as we were all very exhausted and in no mood to spend our evening navigating an unfamiliar town trying to get my prescriptions filled. I have to admit that I was totally LOVING the organization at this office and was really impressed that they had thought to include even the littlest things, like stool softeners. This is embarrassing to admit but anyone who has taken pain medication for a period of time knows how important that is. 

January 2013 Audiogram (Conducted by Audiologist)

A=Left, Esteem Ear

O=Right, Non-Esteem Ear

X=Left, Esteem Ear (when off)

The last portion of my time was spent with Dr. Murray to discuss the results of my hearing test and so that he could answer any outstanding questions we had about the procedure that would take place the next day. 

In regards to my hearing test, the results showed that the hearing in my right, non-esteem ear had decreased roughly 10 decibels across almost all frequency levels since my last test about a year and a half ago. This was not a huge surprise to me as my hearing has declined at this expedited rate since the end of high school. Dr. Murray did not have much to say about this pattern except that we should keep an eye on it and that he has seen patients in which the loss suddenly stopped and stayed the same for a while. I asked if I was still a candidate for the Esteem and he said yes, but that if my hearing loss continued at this rate that I should consider looking into a cochlear implant. Dr. Murray spoke very highly of the cochlear implant in improving clients ability to understand speech and suggested that the cochlear implant would likely become fully implantable within the next 5 or so years.

November 2012 Audiogram (Conducted by Esteem Engineer)

E=Left, Esteem Ear

X=Left, Esteem Ear Before Implant (Baseline)

The test results for my left, Esteem implanted ear remained relatively the same as the test conducted in November (give or take a little). However, my word understanding increased from 60% to 78% when tested at 70 db. This test is generally showing that my hearing with the Esteem falls within the lower spectrum of everyday speech. However, when compared to my baseline results, there is very little gain (see test from November on left). 

Surprised by the increase in my word understanding, I did ask Dr. Murray if there was a difference between the test conducted by the Esteem Engineers and Audiologist, and he essentially said that they are different test. When conducted by an Envoy Engineer, the test bypasses the Esteem sensor so that sound signals are sent directly from the processor to our eardrum for interpretation. When the test is conducted by  an audiologist, signals are sent directly through our ear canal to the sensor and so on. When I asked if one was more accurate than the other, he again expressed that they are two different test and cannot be compared. [Please note that this is my interpretation of the difference that was explained to me. Hopefully this information is accurate but thought it would be good to put a disclaimer here].

In regards to my new test, Dr. Tucker had mentioned earlier that the lack of gain in the low frequencies and the drop at 6000 hz was a bit unusual. Dr. Murray found this unusual as well but felt that overall, my hearing with the Esteem was actually “not that bad”. At this point in the conversation, I was starting to feel a little unsure about my revision surgery as he has mentioned to me on numerous occasions, including today, that there was always the possibility of him going in there and finding absolutely nothing. He asked me, if this were the case tomorrow, would I want him to remove the Esteem. I quickly reported, “Definitely not”. Although it is not perfect, I really do LOVE my Esteem and cannot imagine my life without it! I let out a huge sigh of relief when Dr. Murray followed up by saying that this was probably a good choice for me. 

Feeling a bit concerned and in desperate need of a confidence boost, I asked him if he thought I would benefit from this procedure and if I was making a good decision by moving forward with surgery. In return, he asked me if I wanted to go through with it. While it scared the heck out of me to know that he could go in there and find nothing, I knew in my heart that if I did not go through with this, then there would always be a little voice in my head wondering what could have been. So I said, "Yes, of course".

After my appointments, we headed back to the hotel, cleaned up, and headed to Forbes Mill Steakhouse for dinner, as suggested by Dr. Murray. My husband and I do not get the chance to go out to dinner very often these days, so it was definitely a special treat for us! I could not have asked for a better dinner; the food was absolutely AMAZING!

Over dinner, Lydia gave me something very special to her that had been given to her by her own mother. When her son, my brother in law, was deployed to Afghanistan, her mother had given her a worry stone. Whenever she would worry about her son or was just having a difficult time while he was away, she would rub it to help melt her stress and anxiety away. I know how difficult things were for her when her son was deployed and I can only imagine how significant this rock was to her in getting her through this tough time. She told me that she wanted me to keep this until I began to feel better about the situation and when things finally started to feel like they were falling into place again. 

This gift was truly one of the most heartfelt gifts I have ever received and it meant so much to me to know that I have her support in this journey. I felt very uplifted in this moment as it made me believe for the first time in a while that someday, this journey would be a mere memory in my mind and that I would grow to be a better, stronger, and more understanding individual because of it.

I couldn't have asked for a more perfect way to end the evening.